The Abusive Buyer
How to know when a buyer is “over the line,” and what to do about it
By Richard Gottlieb -- Gifts & Decorative Accessories, 5/1/2006
Put more than two salespeople at a table, and you have the equivalent of kids sitting around a campfire, eating marshmallows and telling horror stories. The only difference is that the ghosts and goblins of these tales are buyers. No Freddie Krueger, Chucky or Jason is scarier than those characters.
The stories always produce trickles of nervous laughter, heads nodding in agreement and a rush to top one horror with an even more outrageous account. Yet when I ask one of the storytellers, “So what did you say back to him?” or “What did you do?” salespeople always respond with a slightly embarrassed: “Nothing. I didn't say anything.”
The truth is that most of the time salespeople just have to grin and bear it.
Saints in suitsSome might say that emotionally beating up a salesperson results in a better price for buyers. They could also say that it's just harmless fun, and in the end their buying decisions put commission money in salespeople's pockets. They could even note that the salespeople to whom they give a hard time tend to laugh it off, and then ask the buyer to lunch, dinner or out for a drink. But the fact is salespeople can't afford not to try to maintain a relationship with a buyer, regardless of the buyer's behavior.
God bless salespeople and their wonderful ability to withstand even the worst encounters. They're the exact opposite of the stereotypical “outraged postal worker” or “trench coat mafia” member who seeks revenge in a blaze of bullets.
Rather, they're so accustomed to handling rejection and insults that they slough off such slings and arrows with a shrug and a laugh. If sociologists want to find a model for civilized behavior in an uncivilized world, they need look no further than the salesperson.
Although most buyers comport themselves in a businesslike manner, whether intentionally or not, some don't. The problem is that if no one says anything, there's no way for a buyer, or their employer, to know when they've stepped over the line from being a tough businessperson to being an abusive one.
Who cares?But why should buyers and their managements care if a salesperson occasionally gets pushed around? After all, it might be good for business, and doesn't it go with the territory anyway? Not really. There are several reasons retailers should establish guidelines for managing and monitoring such behavior.
First, poor treatment of salespeople affects the bottom line. Punishing salespeople by not buying their products is bad business. Buying — or not buying — decisions should be based on maximizing profit and revenue, not exacting vengeance. Such behavior can also affect a retailer's ability to secure hot products when they really want or need them. After all, salespeople do have some say in how products are allocated. It's a rare pleasure for salespeople to route hot products to those who treat them with respect, rather than those who torment them.
Second, tormenting any individual over whom one has power is no less abusive than engaging in similar behavior with one's employees. It's simply unprofessional.
What is abuse?All of this raises a question: How do buyers and their employers know when they've crossed the line from being effective to being abusive?
Here are some things to consider:
- Are buyers insulting or commenting on salespeople's intelligence, accent, ethnicity, race, gender, and/or religion? In other words, are their comments or attempts at “humor” coming at the expense of factors that salespeople cannot change?
- Do buyers seeming to delight in embarrassing salespeople in front of their boss or principal by pointing out real or imagined deficiencies? This is particularly troubling if the buyers have never raised these issues privately.
- Are buyers chronically late for meetings and/or once there, do they rush through them? (An occasional lapse is fine, but a pattern of this behavior wastes a salesperson's time and money.)
- Do buyers punish salespeople for real or perceived personal slights? Have they consciously put them in the “dog house” by not buying from them regardless of the quality or value of their products?
If notified of abusive behavior on the part of a buyer, what can senior retail management do to curtail their employee's bad behavior? Here are some ideas:
- Craft a salesperson abuse policy, the same way you would address abuse within the organization, and post it in a public place. Salespeople may be the last unprotected class of workers, but they're no less deserving of protection.
- Provide salespeople with a safe means of reporting abuse. They have a justified fear of retribution, so make sure that their anonymity is protected. If a company wants to know if one of their buyers is operating illegally or inappropriately, they must provide a safe way for salespeople to report inappropriate behavior.
- Follow up and protect salespeople with whom you've spoken. I can't tell you the number of stories I've heard from salespeople who feel they've been punished by buyers for the crime of “going over their heads.” If you recommend that your buyer see a product, follow up to find out what happened.
Treating people with dignity is always good business. More importantly, it's the right thing to do.
| Author Information |
| Richard Gottlieb is president of Richard Gottlieb & Associates LLC, a provider of business development services. He combines an MBA in Global Management, a Ph.D. candidacy in Applied Management and Decision Sciences, and thirty-five years of business experience. For more information, visit www.richardgottliebassoc.com. |



















